


Unrequited

by hotspaceletsgo



Category: Muse (Band)
Genre: First Time, M/M, Smut, it's pure smut but the plot's kinda sad, kind of sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:20:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21934375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotspaceletsgo/pseuds/hotspaceletsgo
Summary: We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowlYear after year
Relationships: Dom Howard/Tom Kirk, implied Chris Wolstenholme/Tom Kirk, implied Matt Bellamy/Dom Howard
Comments: 4
Kudos: 4





	Unrequited

**Author's Note:**

> Kind of a Christmas-y story. Didn't know what to do with my sad, sad mood, so I put it into writing some shitty plot and there you go.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Dom was smoking on a balcony, an empty bottle of beer abandoned on a glass table. The dark evening accompanied by a wind cold enough to make Dom shiver with each gust wouldn’t even bother him, but the fact that he had no one to freeze with. Well, almost freeze if it weren’t for the cigarette and its slight warmth.  
  
He had someone in mind; a certain guitarist with a scrawny nose and mentality of a six-year-old, but Dom remembered why he couldn’t be with him. He was on his _"kid duty"_ today.  
  
Dom sighed. Matt had a family. A proper one, since he and Elle got married. _”We can’t go on like this, Dom, I love her,”_ he recalled Matt saying. Bollocks, but if that was how he felt… Dom couldn’t argue against it. It didn’t change their band dynamics either, so nothing could be said. And Dom thought he had already overcome the empty feeling and the slight bitterness he felt on his tongue whenever Matt would talk about Elle being the only one in his life. He couldn’t protest. Not in front of Chris who was still completely oblivious to the fact that Matt and Dom had been involved romantically at one point in their career.  
  
The blond took a drag, fast realising that he was on the very end of the cancer stick which had just burnt the inside of his mouth a little bit. Just a quick cough and another cigarette was out.  
  
How selfishly innocent Chris was and remains. Being a great example of a faithful man living in the middle of nowhere with his big happy family… as sappy as it sounds, Chris had never had anything to hide, unlike Matt and Dom. And Tom.  
  
_Speak of the devil.  
_  
A small rock hit the balcony’s railings. When Dom didn’t react, another one followed, this time a slightly bigger with an aim quite precise that it hit Dom’s beer bottle.  
  
Dom put out the ciggy and looked over the balcony, another rock narrowly missing his shoulder. He looked at the source of the interruption and couldn’t be less surprised.  
  
“Saved a bottle for me, wanker?” a black-haired man in a camo bomber, cap and faded blue jeans asked. As much as Dom rolled eyes at Tom sometimes, times like these were his favourite. Some private talk with Tom always seemed to cheer him up and he didn’t have to wallow in the misery of an unwanted relationship alone. Two victims of a failed love life getting pissed up together sounds like the perfect evening.  
  
Dom disappeared back into his flat, threw away his hoodie and opened the door for his friend who, by the time he climbed up the stairs, was shaking with cold.  
  
“Took off your clothes for me already, didn’t you?” Tom grinned.  
  
“Not even cold can stop you from being a cunt, can it?” Dom responded and helped Tom from his jacket, hanging it on the heating. “There’s a blanket on the couch where you can sit. I’ll make you some tea.”  
  
“That bloody thing didn’t even warm me. It’s stylish, but not cold-proof.” The black-haired man sat down, observing Dom’s apartment. “Is your couch new?” he pointed out as he sat down and wrapped himself in the blanket. The piece of furniture was unusually comfy in comparison to all the times he had spent here before, curled up on it, crying his eyes out with Dominic by his side. Oh, and it was black instead of crimson.  
  
“Yep, too much of a reminder. We had our first sex on it, plus all the other times. It was stained and rusty, and needed a change,” Dom answered.  
  
_Tom knew very well what the words meant, that it wasn’t meant just at the couch.  
_  
The blond took the tea, grabbed two bottles of beer from a cupboard and brought it all to Tom.  
  
“Know all that very well. At least _you_ could get rid of it.” Tom took the cup graciously and sighed with content. “Does it feel better?”  
  
“Kind of,” shrugged Dom and sat down next to his friend, deciding to pull out another cigarette. “Want one?” he offered. Tom declined and continued sipping on the hot drink Dom made him.  
  
Dom watched his friend slurp slowly on the tea. “Don’t you wanna spice it up a tad? Should have a bottle of rum somewhere.”  
  
He saw hesitation in Tom’s face for a moment, but it changed quickly to a nod, knowing that tonight, he could get as pissed up as he wanted.  
  
Dom got up and searched around in his cupboards while Tom tried to stop the clattering of his teeth. “Do you want any help?” he called out to the blond, despite not wanting to leave his cosy position on the sofa.  
  
“Actually, could you look to the left cupboard next to the TV? Maybe I moved it the last time Matt was here.” Dom did as much as he could not to let his voice drop at the name of his bandmate, but it was a difficult task, he knew.  
  
With an unmasked grunt Tom got up, bringing the throw with him, wrapped in it tightly, opened the cupboard and searched for the bottle. When he suddenly felt hot breath at the back of his neck, surprised, he banged his head to the roof of the cabinet.  
  
“Woah, it’s just me,” Dom laughed and placed his palm on Tom’s back. “Just coming in to say I found it, but I guess you can take this Whisky from here,” he added and grabbed the liquor bottle, returning to the couch.  
  
Tom rubbed the top of his head. “You could just say it, you didn’t have to scare me and make an idiot out of me.”  
  
“When you’re here? You’re always an idiot to me.” The older man rolled his eyes at Dom’s remark, closed the cupboard door and took a seat next to Dom on the coach, folding the throw over his shoulders again. “Do I intimidate you or what?”  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“That you got scared from me just breathing on you,” Dom smirked.  
  
Tom put his hands around the still warm cup and put it to his lips. “You know it’s not _that_.” He sighed heavily. “It’s just... when we roomed together, he used to creep up behind me and do that. I’m not used to anyone else than Chris.”  
  
_The mood in the room quickly switched to gloomy.  
_  
“So-,” Dom started, but Tom shook his head.  
  
“Don’t mention it. It’s alright.”  
  
The two men were surrounded with silence, apart from Tom occasionally sipping on his tea which he little by little flavoured with rum. First it was just a few drops, then a short stream and finally, when he felt he couldn’t take the weight of his thoughts, it was straight rum mixed with Whisky when Dom offered.  
  
“It got really difficult all of a sudden. After he got married again, I mean. I-I thought... we could...” Tom let out a painful sob.  
  
“You thought they were going to break up soon.” Dom understood exactly what Tom meant. As much as he tried not to sympathise, the words hit too close to home, and he was left with a memory of Matt telling him something along the same lines.  
  
“I’m truly horrible, am I? I mean, I left my wife just to be with him. And he tells me he already found someone.” Tom let out a heavy breath and his head feel backwards. “I could’ve lived for another thirty fucking years happily with my wife and a kid, have a house in Los Angeles and just occasionally dream about him, but I had to ruin it. And for what? For him to tell me he’s fucking someone else,” he said, more exasperated than angry. He never was in the first place. He felt... disappointment.  
  
“You’re not a horrible person. You just acted upon your emotions and... it just didn’t work out,” Dom tried. “But he might never realise what he’s missing.”  
  
Tom moved against the armrest of the couch and slid down a little bit. It was an awkward and uncomfortable position. “I should’ve told him the truth, shouldn’t I? That my marriage crumbled because of what I felt towards him, not because we wanted different things.” He put his legs in Dom’s lap, not even waiting for a response at all. He was just glad he could tell the whole story and Dom was obviously the best person to confide in.  
  
“Maybe. What good would it do? I don’t think Chris is that flexible with his sexuality. Much less with you being one of his best friends.”  
  
“I didn’t even try to make a move on him. You and Matt at least fumbled around.”  
  
Dom propped Tom’s legs on his thighs, so that he could turn his whole body to him and laid his hands on Tom’s shoulders. Grey eyes revealed misery he tried to hide the whole evening, and Tom only felt sorry for his previous words.  
  
“That’s what makes it much more difficult.”  
  
The blond’s hands moved up Tom’s neck to his chin where he was sporting an unkept bristle. He followed the line along the jaw and up to his cheeks, flaming hot by now, not knowing why. Tom stared into Dom’s grey orbs and moved an inch closer. Dom was looking back, his legs curling underneath Tom’s. “Guess it’s worth to have a one-night stand…” Tom whispered the last part, his eyes drooping already, fully aware of what waited ahead if they continued.  
  
“Tom...”  
  
A conjoining of lips followed. Neither could tell who leaned in first, it was just there, and frankly, neither cared. Dom cupped Tom’s face, feeling the roughness of unshaved skin under his fingers. The older grunted when Dom scratched clumsily his cheek. It felt oddly arousing.  
  
Tom, having never kissed a man, let Dom lead the way and where this all was going, since he was the one experienced this time, and Dom leaned all the way into Tom that they fell backwards, the blond laying on top of his friend.  
  
_Strangely, Dom couldn’t get enough of him.  
_  
The longer they kissed, the rougher Dom got, and Tom could only comply, letting out soft whines. The blond didn’t expect his friend to be vocal at all, but it didn’t bother him. Not at all. He felt encouraged.  
  
Ever so slowly, he sneaked his tongue closer to pry open Tom’s lips, but the older hesitated and clipped Dom’s head back to look into the dilated pupils of those grey eyes.  
  
“Dom, can- can we move somewhere my back won’t curse me for laying on it?”  
  
The situation was merely worth a smile, Dom knew, but he still felt so giddy.  
  
Padding of shoes against the wooden floor sounded through the flat as Dom stood up, grabbed Tom’s hand and hurried towards the bedroom. The blond was too excited to talk so he just led the way only waiting for a sound of disapproval from Tom.  
  
_It never came.  
_  
He pointed towards the king-sized bed, Tom thoroughly seeing what Dom meant. He sat at the edge of the bed, hesitating at the action nevertheless.  
  
The younger noticed Tom’s indecisiveness. “Just your _trousers_ , mate, don’t worry,” he sneered. Tom blushed, looking down, and complied. His hands were shaky, but not from fear. He couldn’t quite pinpoint it, but he was sure he wasn’t afraid of what they both evidently wanted to do.  
  
Feeling a bit weird, he shuffled across the white sheets, resting his head on the unmade pillows, waiting for Dom to make a move.  
  
Dom closed the door, for the last time thinking whether he was acting righteously. He didn’t know he wanted this, but he felt it was right. That this was bound to happen one way or another. They were both craving for something they couldn’t have, so it was natural.  
  
_Now they only needed to actually do it.  
_  
The blond moved towards the bed, carefully placing his legs on both sides of Tom’s waist as if not to scare him. He was still very much new to this and Dom didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable.  
  
Tom’s chocolate brown eyes watched Dom’s face expectantly.  
  
Dom started kissing Tom’s mouth, soft whines coming from the elder which excited the blond beyond all boundaries. Tom was clumsy with his mouth, but that didn’t deter Dom, only encouraged to keep going for his inexperience.  
  
_He felt the need to teach him a lesson on this topic.  
_  
Their lips disconnected, and Dom moved lower, tasting Tom’s neck, collarbones and gradually moving to his sternum. In comparison to Matt, and even Dom himself, Tom was definitely hairier.  
  
It sort of bothered him, since he wasn’t used to it, but the change made everything more interesting.  
  
As if Dom’s lips obtained a mind of their own, he wasted no time on Tom’s stomach, moving straight to the happy trail leading inside his underwear.  
  
Tom was breathing heavily when Dom’s hands pulled at the waistband of his boxers, tugging them over his legs, abandoning them somewhere on the bed.  
  
Dom caressed the inside of Tom’s thighs, but he didn’t dare to look at Tom’s cock yet. He wanted to savour this moment; Tom almost _begging_ Dom to relieve him, breathing heavily, eyes closed, head thrown backwards.  
  
_Under Dom’s control.  
_  
Once again, he placed his lips against the hot skin and started his journey up, leaving wet kisses on Tom’s thigh.  
  
He stopped in his tracks and focused on a small cluster of hair where he saw lines and traces of faded blue ink. “What’s that?”  
  
Tom was breathless, keeping his eyes closed, his head thrown backwards. “ _What_ do you mean?”  
  
“Fucking _look_ what I mean.” Dom pressed his fingers to the spot he saw. The older hissed and Dom looked up.  
  
“Sensitive,” he explained. The blond nodded, the dispersed touches continued to rake through the hairs, until the lines were fully visible to Dom. It was a tattoo.  
  
_It read C.T.W.  
_  
Dom gasped. “Are you bloody- _C.T.W.?_ Are you mad?! When did you get it?”  
  
“I-I don’t know?” Tom’s voice was quivering, and he totally knew Dom knew he was lying.  
  
“Come on, Tom, I’m serious. That’s not a joke, having a tattoo of your bandmate right next to your dick.” Dom settled next to Tom on the bed, propping his head with one hand, looking directly into the brown eyes full of lust.  
  
Tom was silent for a few minutes, but Dom knew he had to gather his thoughts together to formulate it all.  
  
The older man let out a breath he didn’t realise he was holding in. “I had it made about a year ago. When Muse started touring with Simulation Theory in America. I... I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted to tell him so bad, but I knew I couldn’t because- because you just don’t tell your mate you love them.”  
  
Dom had a strong urge to tell him that that was exactly what he did to Matt. He kept it to himself. This wasn’t the time to boast.  
  
“So, I got a tattoo. I was drunk that night I got it, the day later I almost freaked out. And of course, I didn’t tell anyone about it, so I rolled with it. When I arrived home, Jaclyn noticed, but I explained it as a lost bet, and she believed. Until she knew the actual reason.”  
  
“And weren’t you afraid she would tell Chris?” Dom asked, laying his free hand on Tom’s chest.  
  
“She... she was never angry with me. More disappointed, not angry. I tried to explain everything. It wasn’t likely that she’d understand, but she grasped the whole thing like I wanted her to. We obviously couldn’t stay together, but she promised, and I still trust her very much.” Tom felt like he needed some anchor to keep him down to Earth, because everything seemed so out of this world. He put his hand over Dom’s on his chest.  
  
“You were lucky with her.”  
  
“I wish I never met him. I wish we didn’t become friends. I wish... I wish I didn’t _love_ him.”  
  
“I know what you mean, Tom.” Dom sighed heavily, curling up on Tom’s side. “I know what you mean.”  
  
They enjoyed the other’s body heat for a few minutes, just being there, watching the darkness of the room and getting used to it, the feeling of the other becoming less and less foreign.  
  
Then, Dom moved slightly up, kissing Tom’s cheek. “You do realise you’ll need to tell Chris someday, right?”  
  
Tom turned his head sideways and pecked the blond’s lips. “When we’re old. That’ll be the right time,” he grinned.  
  
“Don’t wait too long. Maybe you have a chance with him,” Dom pointed out. His hand was drawing circles on the elder’s chest, then started moving slowly, almost teasingly downwards.  
  
The hand stopped only centimetres above Tom’s groin, and he hitched a breath, closing his eyes once again. “I-I don’t think so. Caris is pregnant again. This hurts l-less than seeing him away from his family.” He nodded, a silent invitation for Dom to keep going.  
  
_It's been too long.  
_  
Dom's hand curled around the base of Tom's dick, tugging gingerly at first, getting used to the size, and slowly, Dom was increasing the pace of his movements. The fingers of his other hand ghosted over the whole length, working as a teasing tool, and it seemingly worked because not long after Dom began his actions, Tom was gasping for air, whispering the blond's name over and over, and yet he knew that wasn't enough, that both of them wanted more.  
  
Dom kissed Tom's lips and slid atop of him, letting go of Tom's shaft. The head was already wet with precum.  
  
_This was but a simple foreplay, but he could come easily, having Dom do that a minute or two longer. He was that turned on.  
_  
Sitting on Tom's thighs, holding his chest down, Dom groaned into the other's mouth, his pelvis starting to rock against Tom on its own accord, to which Tom subconsciously responded with his hips. The elder’s hands played in Dom's hair, gripping it roughly and releasing it again, before he began roaming lower, exploring Dom's golden skin, tautly muscled figure, perfect shoulders and many more features the drummer had obtained over the years.  
  
Tom had never found himself being attracted to Dom, but he understood why _others_ were. Dom was the personification of the adjective 'generally attractive' and it was a widely known fact.  
  
_If he got the chance to be shagged by Dom Howard, he sure as hell wasn't passing that up.  
_  
A shock of cold fingers playing at his entrance brought him back to reality. Right, Dom was actually here to fuck him.  
  
"Have you ever done this before?" Dom asked out of nowhere, perhaps to break the tension.  
  
"I've had sex before, Dom," Tom returned, breathless.  
  
Dom pushed just the tip of his finger inside Tom, making him shudder. "I meant men. Have you ever done it with a man?"  
  
Tom remained silent.  
  
"So, I'm basically taking your virginity two." The blonde slid all the way in and probed around for a bit. It withdrew another loud gasp from Tom, and he forced the blond into another deep tongue battle, all while getting used to the intrusion.  
  
They broke apart for a breather and Tom's lips glazed with saliva. "You bitch," he reacted. He moved his hips upwards again, meeting Dom's cock. "Make it hurt as little as possible, please."  
  
Dom heard the shaky tone Tom spoke in, so he decided to have a bit of fun before jumping right into it. "Don't worry, your arse-virginity is safe with me."  
  
Tom punched his ribs lightly, trying to hide his nervousness.  
  
"Don't worry, really. It's gonna be alright." Dom pecked the other's lips.  
  
He added another finger.  
  
Tom hissed uncomfortably, grabbing Dom's shoulders, and closed his eyes.  
  
"I know it doesn't feel good now," Dom said, trying to sympathise with Tom. He remembered how was his first time with Matt. It was fantastic.  
  
_But fucking hell it hurt the first few minutes.  
_  
"Y-you know?" Tom stuttered, looking up in the grey eyes.  
  
"Let me finish, you wanker, I'm trying to help you." Dom's voice boomed with laughter. "It's gonna get better, I promise. Like, not immediately, but... yeah."  
  
His fingers were sliding in and out, coated in the lube Dom had pulled out of his nightstand, while Tom was pondering about Dom's looks. The older somehow got used to the feeling, and thought he was prepared for the next step.  
  
His hand slid down to Dom's left hand, tugging at the fingers that were causing his discomfort. "Dom, just-just do it."  
  
Dom understood completely and complied to Tom's wishes. He pulled out his fingers, wiping them to the bedsheets, then reached to his bedside table again and pulled out a small plastic pocket. Tom watched him with stark intensity, both of his hands now on the blond's hips, and Dom was aware of the dark, lustful eyes that gazed at every move of his muscles.  
  
_Matt and Tom weren't any different in this.  
_  
The drummer made eye contact with Tom as he was putting the condom on and despite having done it some many times, only Tom made him blush and he didn't know why. _Bastard._  
  
He leaned down, kissing Tom's saliva-coated lips yet again, before he tried as painlessly as he could to push inside him. The kiss was supposed to distract him, at least from the initial resistance and pain, and it worked long enough for Dom to slide further. Tom squirmed at few clumsy pushes, but to Dom's surprise, he remained calm the whole time Dom was kissing him.  
  
He was halfway in when he pulled away in order to breathe and swiftly moved forward, trying to cause as little pain as possible.  
  
Dom was astonished at the noise of please that came out of Tom and the throw of his head backwards. It was low, scratchy and it almost sounded like Dom's name.  
  
_Hearing that tone was better than any porn he'd seen.  
_  
He started moving in and out, first gently, allowing Tom to feel every millimetre of him, and after a few strokes he found a pace that suited them both. Tom's head was still resting heavily in the pillow, mewling for Dom, begging for more, and Dom was willing to give him everything he could offer.  
  
"You feel so good, incredibly good..." Tom groaned.  
  
Dom leaned closer to his ear, using his low voice. "It gets better."  
  
It didn't take long, and Dom found the right spot, Tom's murmuring getting louder with each hit.  
  
Tom's hands held on Dom's hips tightly and the blond was sure there were going to be bruises the next day.  
  
_Fuck. That.  
_  
"I'm not gonna last long..." Tom whispered in warning.  
  
Dom's hand travelled between them and took hold of Tom again, matching the pace of his cock.  
  
"Love being inside you," Dom breathed out and arched his back to drive all the way in at a different angle.  
  
"Fuck, yes, please!"  
  
Tom ran his short nails across Dom's back, leaving marks. Dom dipped down and kissed his prominent collar bones.  
  
"God, _Chris_."  
  
_That was unexpected.  
_  
The voice pushed Dom over the edge and Tom was falling with him, the blond's head buried in Tom's neck. Tom's mouth hung open like a fish, gasping for air.  
  
_The intensity of the orgasm was unbelievable.  
_  
Breathing quickly, heavily, Tom finally opened his eyes and looked at the blond with a lazy smile plastered on his face. His hands were still around the blond's neck, tracing vague shapes, caressing the smooth skin he had never thought he would've had the chance to touch.  
  
_Dom so wasn't his type.  
_  
It took a while before either one could move, and in the end, it had to be Dom. He pulled out of Tom, the elder gasping at the absence of the pressure, and collapsed half on the bed, half on Tom. He felt a slight muscle pain in his arms and shoulders caused by putting the weight into them, but it felt more like a blissful pain.  
  
Tom's breathing steadied, and his mind cleared up. His hand dove into Dom's golden hair, playing with some loose strands.  
  
Tom didn't feel like talking, but this encounter made him realise a few things and he needed to put it together, like a puzzle he'd been prepared to start with.  
  
Dom sensed his friend's mind was absent and he understood completely. "Call him right now, please. I can't stand you like that," he smirked.  
  
Tom didn't hesitate. He stood up from the bed, found his trousers and fished his phone out his back pocket. "Dom, remember what we have." He leaned over Dom's head, kissing the blond, as if to silently thank him for knocking some sense into him. "We don't love each other. But we're solid. We have this strong bond which allows us to do things we did tonight without worrying about the consequences."  
  
Dom could only nod; all the words he wanted to speak were already said. He settled on the bed, one arm under his head, the other playing at the rim of the duvet he was under.  
  
The elder punched in a number he knew by heart, and Dom was aware of how strong, and _different_ , emotions Tom felt towards Chris. It was beautifully tragic.  
  
It took three rings until the receiver picked it up. "Hello Tom?"  
  
"Hi Chris, sorry for bothering at this unholy hour," Tom apologised, his voice visibly shaking.  
  
_"That's alright, I couldn't sleep anyway,"_ Chris chuckled. Dom saw Tom blush. _"What's the matter?"_  
  
Tom coughed. "Ehm, do think you could meet me at the nearest pub? There's something I need to chat about with you."  
  
_"Oh, alright. Can we meet at your house, though? I don't think there's any pub open. We can discuss it in private. Plus, I get to drink for free,_ " Chris suggested, and Tom could see the smile.  
  
_This was even better than Tom would've thought.  
_  
"Yeah, you're right, it'll be better at mine anyway. See you soon, mate!" And he hung up, afraid he would screw this whole thing up before even seeing Chris. Frantically, he reached for his shirt, boxers and trousers, putting them on quickly, and he threw a final glance at the blond. "Thank you, Dom. For everything you did tonight and for what kind of a friend you are. You'll resolve everything someday."  
  
He was gone from the flat in a few seconds, unable to wait any longer.  
  
Dom laid in his bed, sprawled across the whole length of it, overthinking that night and what he did with Tom. There were no hard feelings, it was just the need to be close to someone whom he'd known for more than half of his life.  
  
_He just hoped Tom was right with the thing resolving._


End file.
